KRAMER VS.
Terrorists from Mars

By IRWIN KRAMER
The Daily Record
January 20, 2004

The “War on Terrorism” has become “The War of the Worlds.”

In the wake of Sept. 11, our commander in chief warned us that ridding the world of terrorism would not be easy.

“This is a different war from any our nation has ever faced, a war on many fronts,” President George W. Bush said.

Rather than wait for the next attack, Bush promised to “take the battle to the enemy, disrupt its plans, and confront the worst threats before they emerge.”

Both houses of Congress applauded when the president first outlined “our great national priority” to “hunt down the terrorists,” but it didn’t take long before his political opponents stopped clapping. Though many would question the need for aggressive, preemptive strikes, Bush has steadfastly maintained his priority to rid the world of terrorism.

Keeping his promise, Bush took the battle to the enemy, fighting the evil Taliban rulers of Afghanistan and all others having ties to al-Qaida. When “government intelligence” revealed Saddam Hussein’s possible ties to these terrorists, the president spared no expense in attacking his evil regime, liberating the people of Iraq, and protecting the world from his “weapons of mass destruction.” Fearing the same fate, Libya’s evil ruler cowered to American might and recently agreed to abandon his own tools of terrorism.

The world might be safer without these threats, but our president’s priorities remain the same: “We will not leave the safety of America, and the peace of the planet, at the mercy of a few mad terrorists and tyrants.”

With Afghanistan, Iraq and Libya out of the way, we must now save the planet from an even more formidable foe — the Martians.

Although he couldn’t share his real reasons for sending men to Mars, a president who truly understands “our great national priority” would not spend $12 billion of our defense budget merely to lift “our national spirit.” While the Democrats complain that he is acting without “government intelligence,” it is hard to believe that Bush would invade Mars without classified evidence of weapons of mass destruction.

Rather than wait for an attack by little green men from the red planet, our president must keep “the peace of the planet” by keeping his promise “to take the battle to the enemy and to stop them.” Lest we forget the lessons of history, some still recall the terror of October 30, 1938, as Orson Welles broadcast the bloodshed caused by “an invading army from the planet Mars.” While reports of this New Jersey invasion and their unusual weapons of mass destruction have since been discredited as a Halloween hoax, in the wake of 9/11, our president takes all threats very seriously.

Thanks to his space initiative, we need not wait for menacing aliens to invade our nation and have us take them to our leader. Our leader is coming after them as he keeps his promise to “wage a war to save civilization itself.” As he told us long ago, “One way to defeat terrorism is to show the world the true values of America.”

“My fellow Americans, let’s roll.”